Choices.

Been long since I last posted.

Aishh... I should really post some pics up soon.

Maybe I'll get a few from Zeke soon...

Weather's been real hot and warmer recently. Top temperatures reaching 33 degrees and the lowest is 26 degrees.

I finally began driving lessons again. From my uncle. As in real uncle.

And I like his way of teaching. Hope I'll really get better.

Facebook Apps are the way to go when you're bored at home.

Either that, or some old school games like Starcraft with a few buddies can be a way to pass the time.

Anyhoo, I went to the club recently.

TO GET EXPERIENCE!

I didn't drink, but I was coerced to go into the dance floor to shake that stiff booty of mine.

Interesting place, but the bleddy speakers nearly made my eardrums burst. Somehow, I went home and could still feel the bass of the stereos lingering in my ears.

Oh well, at least I made friends with Joel's classmates.

And they're really nice people.

Totally way different from the others in the club.

Those in the club could only be described with 1 word.

"Wild."

Today, I went to Mummy's Office to help her pack her stuff on her desk before going to the new location of her office.

Ate with her before going to meet Ganesh, Naveen, Joel and his classmates for dinner.

And also to celebrate Keen Hong, one of Joel's classmates birthday.

Seriously, I should just type "my friend", instead of "Joel's classmates".

Anyone I know, is my friend mah!

Before we celebrated the "Surprise" birthday cake, we played a few games like "Mu Tou Ren/Wooden Dummy".

Ran like I've never did before.

And my calves feel the pinch of not training for a long time.

Then while we're resting, Me, Ganesh and Joel went to try out some flips and handstands.

I flew over Naveen's back, followed by Ganesh.

Then we cut the "Surprise" Birthday Cake and shared it among all of us, including the 2 security guards who lent us their lighter for the candles.

By the way, I said "Surprise" with double apostrophes because...

It was so bleddy obvious that there was a cake LAH!

But at least we celebrated!

With English, Chinese and Korean birthday songs!

After finishing the cake, we parted ways and took the train home.

I went to have some sort of a pep-talk with Joel, while Ganesh headed home.


Back to topic.

Its 5:22 am currently.

I feel damn tired. But I can't really sleep until I type this out.

This whole week, I feel that I've really learnt a lot of stuff.

Not only learnt, but also, I've seen a lot of stuff.

Saying it just like that doesn't really help I guess. I should describe it then.


Thursday, I went out for a short while with my Dad to get some A4 size paper for printing. After that, we went to have some drinks at the nearby coffeeshop. His buddies were there as usual. We sat at another table and just talked and joked as usual. I went off after finishing my drink and carried the ream of A4 papers home while my dad went to talk with his buddies.

During the conversation between my dad and me, I could see how he felt.

Joy.

Happiness.

One, because the both of us haven't had drinks together like that for a pretty long time. About a few months.

Two, we rarely talk and joke that much at home.

That expression on his face. I would never forget it.

Today, I went to meet my mum to help her pack her stuff on her workdesk as they were shifting to a new office. I enjoyed packing the stuff with her.

We jokingly scolded each other on how to place and arrange the stuff neatly into the boxes. How we slowly wrapped the computer with plastic. How she gave me tasks such as sealing the boxes which were done.

After packing, we went to have prata at a nearby stall near her office. There, we talked and talked as usual.

Oh, I communicate more to my mum than my dad.

I told her about my problem. She told me a sentence.

I'm not going to type out the whole sentence though. I'll encode it in another format.

She said something like this, "Would you rather let a person fall from a curb, or bring that person to the 12th storey to have a harder fall?"

After that, we walked back to the MRT station where I sent her off to the bus before taking the train to meet the guys.

When we reached Tampines, Ganesh went back while me and Joel went to the playground to talk.

I gave him my reason for choosing this.

Somehow, I get that feeling that the reason I gave would look like just any other reason all the other guys in the world would give just to escape from the problem.

But, this reason I gave, is the truth.

Nothing but only the truth.

One of the sentences I asked Joel was, "Would you rather act and not be yourself for your whole life, or just portray who you are, yourself?"

Then I jokingly added, "If you chose to act, before you die, do tell me. So I can give you an Oscar."

On the way back in the train, I was thinking even more harder than any other exam I have taken in my whole life.

Whether I should choose to do this or that.

I care about everyone.

Not only my family, but my friends.

I worry about how my mother can survive on just that little amount of money.

How my dad feels each time he is sick.

How my sister having not enough money.

I worry about what are the consequences of each and every action I do, every word I speak, everything I say to everyone.

Sometimes, I might make you mad.

Sometimes, I might just make you disappointed.

Even sometimes, I might make you feel sad or even cry.

Each and everytime, I really want to try my best to make everyone around me smile.

But when the problem doesn't leave me with an option, I'll choose the best choice not only for me, but for everyone.

After hearing something, this was what I replied:

Everyone was born great, to do great things. The only reason some of them aren't that great or are bad, is because of the choices that they made under some circumstances.

And for that choice, 제가저말미안해.