3rd Day of Attachment.

Attachment.

And its getting pretty dull.

Mainly because I have nothing to do.

And when that happens, I get sleepy.

And its boring and frustrating when you can't sleep when you're sleepy.

Its the 3rd day of IPP.

Well. Its counted the second day for me.

Cos I'm on leave today.

Had something on and then needed to grab some FYP files at my "previous" computer before I left.

GNS3 Scenarios.

.Net files.

Etc etc etc.

Leaving behind the Counter-strike and Warcraft III.

Then, I spent half my time there at Level 3 with a few of the good ol' 0603.

Crapping. Playing Joni's iPhone.

Laming around as usual.

Then I went up to Level 6 to see the lab. At the same time, get my files.

Mr Bala's team took over me and Aaron's com. Network Scanning.

Then I saw Clarence using Wireshark. Something similar to what was placed inside the GNS3 Manual.

Mr Wagio's team was doing something new. Taking over Alvin's and Zhiyang's computers.

Then I saw something.

The damned Ceylonese.

He's there to supervise the people doing his project in the next phase. Pfft.

Then went down to Level 3 again before going up to eat with the Ceylonese.

Then followed 06 ol' three to south.

Then I don't know why, but I didn't have the mood to head home.

So I stayed there till around 6 and went home with them.

And I feel.

I have lost some fun time with them.

Perhaps its due to IPP and FYP.

I need to spend more time with them.

First day at work. First meeting of 0603 after 3 months!

Today, I officially start my attachment.

And apparently, its pretty boring.

Most probby because my OIC is not in the office.

So I got no work to do.

Yang yang so lucky. Got OIC. Got work to read up.

So I read up on the various routing protocols again with him until my eyes almost want to close.

Then came 1pm. Met up with the old 0603 chaps who were having their FYP now. And they look really, different.

Some looked skinny. Some looked much better. Some looked damn happy.

I was happy to see them again. Like duh!

So long since I heard Joni, Kevin, JS, Eileen and Chun's voice.

No. If its what you're thinking now, I'm not gay.

Now I really feel like going back to school to do FYP.

Cos I think it would be damn fun to do FYP with them.

Everyday, deciding on what to eat.

Where to go.

What to do.

Talk crap.

Too bad. I'm in IPP now. But since school is so close, I guess dropping by once or twice wouldn't hurt.

Then back at home. Crapping with the brasthers again. As usual.

We got Doraemon's song! WOOTSA!

And then, the next day is about to begin in like 6 hours time.

So I better rest now.


Apparently, Zijian left another piece of advice for me.

I can run fast.

Like, damn fast.

And its called sprinting.

But, my sprinting lasts for awhile.

Because I lack stamina.

Motivation to endure.

Confidence to complete.

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And Eileen,

You might think you're fat.

But what you think,

Doesn't necessarily reflects on what you really look like.

Don't make yourself miserable for what you think you aren't

Instead, make yourself enjoyed and relaxed for what you know you are.

End of time.

Finally, after 12 weeks of project-ing and fun.

I can say "Bye."

Not that I'm happy about leaving FYP.

It has brought happy, and unhappy times.

Of course, remember the good times and forget the bad ones.

Student Meal Hotcakes with Sausage for S$4.50 every morning
Lunch trips
Class outings
Seoul Garden feast
Prawn "slaying"
Rides at Downtown East
Big Walk Event

Memories, that stay forever,
And will not be forgotten.
Even if I do forget,
Looking at the door of the lab L-633,
Will refresh and remind me,
Of the fun and laughter,
We had together.

Today, 3 of us went to catch a movie at Marina Square.

Me, Alvin and Zijian.

Quantum Of Solace.

Since it was like the end, we almost fell asleep. I pretty much think its due to the comfy seats and the cooling air-con.

Still, I forced my eyes to stay open till now. This is the second time I'm watching it. And its still nice to watch again.

The plot. The action. Definitely worth the second time.

Not the third time though.

Perhaps we will catch the upcoming Donnie Yen movie together again. Or perhaps Ong Bak 2.

Zijian left a note for me at the bottom of his recent post.

It does have a reason though.

A pretty sad day today. The last "chance" to do it.

Yet I've failed. And saw something else that has made me feel broken and lost again.

I may not know what is happening. But I definitely can infer some scenarios from what I've seen.

And since I'm negative, I'll always choose the worst one.

At least I don't fall hard if I fail.

I may have the power.

But doesn't each and everyone of us have it?

I may be a gem waiting to be discovered.

But some gems take decades.

Perhaps centuries.

Or millenniums, before they get discovered.

I've been waiting all my life.

Who's to say I'll need to wait another few more years to come?

The image of what I saw, loops indefinitely in my mind.

Perhaps, it was all a facade.

An imagination.

Something that doesn't happen in reality so often.

I'm worn out. Tired. Dead beat.

Yet, the looping of this memory, troubles and storms my mind with infinite whirls and jolts.

I used to find reason for everything I do. Then, I'll do it.

Funny.

This time, I've found reason.

But without courage and confidence to do it.

And its gradually leaking away within.

Just like what James Bond said.

When the adrenaline kicks in.

There has to be something to compensate.

Each time I get nearer, my adrenaline builds up.

Tension rises.

But, I can't compensate for it.

Not even a single shot.

Faces. Facades. Assumptions.

This post is separated into 2 sections.

I might draw bad blood.

But if I don't have my say in this, I feel I wasn't even part of this to begin with.

12 weeks ago, we were silent.

Anti-social.

Mostly attributed to the fact, we don't even know each other at all before.

Then, 2 to 3 weeks later.

We bonded together like a new class. Instead of just being lab mates.

Time passed and we became somewhat, a family.

Things go so well onwards.

But perhaps the saying is really true.

Good things, always come to an end.

Or is it really true?

Perhaps its just a misconception or an excuse humans make up, just to explain on their inability to think before they act.

On my two cents worth, I seriously do not think someone would want to ruin something, planned from weeks ago, just because he or she feels like it.

Even if there was rivalry or a fight in between, the situation causes both parties to suffer losses.

Both in friendship, and in monetary terms.

Perhaps when you combine friendship and money together, you get the word:

Jealousy

Then there are those, that only consider one part of the story.

After which, they trust in that story and don't want to hear more.

They would stick with that side. Sometimes which people might think, its the correct, righteous, victorious and the side that is always right.

They don't listen to what the other party has to speak or say before acting.

I dare you.

Take perhaps 50 to around 100 people to stand in a line.

Ask the first person to pass a fairly simple logic or theory, to the next person.

Then vice versa.

Sure. For the first 20 persons, the message might be passed on correctly.

But I am sure, within the next 30 to 50 persons, the message will be jumbled up into something even more complicated that doesn't even makes sense.

Then ask the last and the first person to compare what they have heard.

The moral of this dare?

Try listening to what both sides have to say. Then deduce a conclusion before jumping to stupid assumptions.

I know I myself haven't heard the other part of the story yet. But I choose to believe in the part which I heard.

Because at least someone shares what happens with me.

Instead of forming an alliance.

You said it was a class decision to cancel this event.

I don't see a class decision if I don't even know this happened.

You want to know what I see?

A group, rapidly discussing silenting about stuff a class can't even know.

And a silent girl, unknowing of what is spoken behind her back.

And the rest, scattered into not knowing what is even happening.

And I definitely do not think a class is only made up of a group of 4 to 5 people.

Unless, you want to separate the class.

I suggest you call it a group instead.

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Just read Zijian's blog.

And I feel it makes a hell lot of sense.

And I really tend to give up from what I see.

Instead of what I know.

Not that I can know what a person is thinking.

I sure am no Matt Parkman, who can read everyone's thoughts.

And even if I might have deja vu, or premonitive senses.

But I definitely cannot see what is going to happen next.

Yet again, even mentally, or physically, I don't have enough stamina to run forever. I really need a hint.

A clue.

A goal to achieve.

A starting line to know, when can this slow run allow me to sprint for eternity.

Perhaps, I should jump.

Higher.

Farther.

Lastly, to fly into the sky.

I may not have enough confidence to even step in to talk to you.

But I really want to.

The First Impression.

Its currently like 12:12 am. Just completed half of my presentation slides for my FYP final presentation on Wednesday. I hope nothing screws up by then.

And I'm damn tired from editing presentation slides. Printing screens.

My god.

Not to mention, later at school.

I got animations to do.

At least there's work. Can't blame anyone for that though.

Now back to topic.

I wonder.

How many people depend on the first impression to know a person?

Like for example, Me.

I would bet that almost everyone, would think I'm a malay boy at first sight.

Then I speak chinese and I shock the whole world.

And they give this face.

O.O

With that "WOW" look.

Of course, this makes it hard for me to find friends. I can't speak malay. Not that fluent. Just some random slang.

In fact, I'm more fluent in chinese than malay.

Yet, because of this, I manage to make more chinese friends than malay friends.

But all in all,

Does the First Impression really count so much?

Changing. Yet again.

Yes. I've abandoned the cutesy look for a rather normal, default template.

Not to mention, the website's looking a bit shaky.

Blame me if you want. I just wanted something to display my blog title. Heh.

Not to mention, I saw Zijian's blog. And had an idea. In fact, this post came from one of his posts too.

Anyways, its nearing the end of FYP / FYPJ. Whatever you call it.

Just another 5 more days before I have my weekend to rest before starting IPP, or attachment if you might call it.

Time really flies. When you're pretty much enjoying yourself. And it moves at such a pace so slow you could even see it pass by you when there's practically nothing to do.

But I must really thank FYP for letting me to know the whole of L633.

Alvin, my old secondary school buddy.
Zijian and Karkit, the Monster Hunters.
Zhiyang, the guy to really ask for help when you have problems.
Spenser, for DE-E-ing with me.
Aaron, for being Mr Gorgeous.
Johnny, for basketball.
Bear, for the PSP games.
The rest of the girls, for being a really crazy and lunatic bunch in the lab.

The last 5 days on L633.
I'll miss the monster hunting.
LAN gaming inside.
Crap.
Doing GNS3.
NAPFA trainings.
The level 4 pull-up bar.
Mr Wagio and Mr Lam.
Shopping Arcade, especially the trips to Cheers.
Cakes from the birthday celebrations.
Lunch with the peeps.
Saying the word "Sotong" when someone comes.
Seeing Mark Lim.

Definitely,
The peeps in L633.
You guys made FYP like a holiday.

Then not to miss out.
EI0603.
The best class to have ever existed.
Since 2006.
And to exist forever.

I'll definitely come back from my workplace to have lunch with you guys.
Jie Sheng.
Joni.
Eileen.
Chun Hwee.
Sashayz.
Hidayat.
Ken.
And the rest of the class.

The people I won't forget.

Forever.

Time.

Yet another hectic week has passed. And my deadline nears.

Today's topic is going to be on Time.

Or 时间.

Or 時間.

Probably one of the most important factors in the world. It decides on what happens to everything.

How one grows.

How one ages.

How much one learns.

How long one takes.

And of course, it affects more things than just that.

Time has affected me a lot.

It has created bonds. Families, Friends.

It has made me grow older. Definitely stronger. Allowed me to learn things until the age I am today. During this course of time, I've had a few helping hands.

I've seen people. Made new friends.

Then comes the other bad side of Time.

It doesn't stop.

Project deadlines moves at such a speed it reaches your doorstep in a blink of an eye. Exams and tests just pop up everywhere. And of course, it shortens amount of time you can do something before it vanishes away.

Which is why we have the word, Opportunity.

Of course, I'm not going to do a whole definition on the word Time itself. This post, is about how Time has, or should I say, is going to affect me soon.

1 more week before I physically disappear from school for 3 months for my IPP.

1 week ago, I saw someone.

I don't really know why. I feel happy whenever I see this person.

And perhaps, this could be the reason why my pimples are clearing.

I meant the happiness thingy by the way.

And I feel extremely tensed up when I see this person.

I guess you guys know what I'm talking about.

Time, however, has somehow challenged me.

I have 1 more week before it gets harder to know that person better.

I don't know if its an opportunity. I can't really see when opportunities appear.

But I wanna go for it. Just to give it my best shot.

A chance that doesn't always come by.

I officially declare myself, a bastard.

Back. Finally found some free time. Well, mostly because my lappy's becoming an irritant by auto restarting.

Therefore, without further ado, I hereby declare myself:

A Bastard.

For not posting after countless weeks.
For playing games and not doing my project.
For spending a big amount of money this month.
And for every other bad stuffs you want to place here.

Still, everything's been going well.

GNS3 is really becoming easier to understand.
So is Dynagen.
And they both run together with Dynamips.

Driving as usual, is fail.

Birthdays, birthdays and more birthdays with the fun L633.

Premonitions coming true as usual. The exact image of me holding a stress ball while talking to Wagio.

And not to mention I had a dream / nightmare about my friend getting involved in a car accident that left her with zero scars even though she flew like... 1000 feet in the air?

Record breaking I guess.

Did I mention she had a parachute strapped on too?

Ok, that's pretty dumb.

ANYHOO!

Back to topic.

Oh by the way, I learnt that word from a friend on mine. The kok blog.

Seriously, back to topic.

Did a blood donation recently. Don't think my blood's gonna be used though. My damn temperature was like 37.2 degrees. The nurse did say my blood pressure was not bad. The moment the needle went in my vein, blood gushed like...

Diarrhoea, flowing like the river.

But, I liked the feeling of donating blood.

I feel some sadomasochistic feelings running through me. Bwahahahaha! Just kidding. But its really fun to see how much one can give, and at the same time, help others with it.

And I became a volunteer for the blood donation drive the next day.

Which coincidentally, is today.

And I saw something.

Which only I know.

A few others know.

And... no one else.

Or perhaps one more person who knows.

Seriously, who knows.